Walk with me, dad

 Approximately the end of August of 1965, Dad put my luggage in his bike.Both my dad and I walked the bike from my house to the train station to take a train from Chang-Hua (彰化） to Hsing-Jue (新竹） , Taiwan, where my college would be for the next year. 

That summer, after a brutal college entrance examination, I was admitted to a very prestigious university, the National Tsing-Hua University （國立清華大學）, the department of nuclear engineering （核子工程系）. The school of choice was important not only from the perspectives of job opportunities after college; but more importantly, the tuition difference.  The tuition of National Tsing-Hua University ran a few thousand New Taiwan Dollars (N.T.), while the tuition of a less prestigious university could run tens of thousand N.T.  at the time.  With our economic situation at the time, we simply could not afford the tuition for the college education. 

After approximately 45 minutes of walk, we arrived at the train station.  After another 30 minutes, the train arrived. Dad helped me to bring the luggage into the train.  My dad sat next to me on the train.  That was the first time Dad and I had a good and long conversation.  

Dad (1906-1999) was born in 1906 to a very poor peasant with a last name of Huang (黃）  My grandfather, Chen Hu （陳虎）, adopted dad into Chen’s family.  My dad’s name is Chen Mai （陳買）.  Literal translation of Mai means ‘bought’, buying my dad from Mr. Huang. It was an unofficial adoption fee. I  know my grandfather, Chen Hu, only from the photo.  I even did not see the photo of my other dad’s birth parents. My dad tried not to think or say much  about my Huang’s grandfather, because in some sense, my dad felt he was deserted by his birth parents.  My dad was well treated in his new family of Chen’s. 

Japan ruled Taiwan from 1895 to 1945.  Thus, most of his youth was under the Japanese influence.  My dad finished his elementary school education and then was asked to work to support Chen’s family.  Japanese education emphasized physical education.  For most of his life of 94 years, he was free from any chronic illness.  

I was born in 1946, a year after Nationalist Chinese or KuoMingTang (國民黨） took over Taiwan. The following year, Taiwan had the February 28 revolt followed by a massacre of approximately tens of thousand Taiwanese, mostly the intellect.  Then Taiwan went through a turbulent time.  The inflation was off the chart.  A 10,000 old Taiwan Dollar to exchange for one single New Taiwan dollar.  Famine and disease followed.  Chiang KAi-Shek declared martial law in 1949 putting all Taiwanese resources in defense. We were extremely poor during most of my childhood time.  

During my childhood years, my eldest brother, Mo-KAi （模楷）who had a bank job lived in Taipei.  My second eldest brother, Ting-KAi,（廷楷） was studying abroad in Germany.  At home, we had my 3rd eldest brother, Wen-KAi （文楷） who was 5 years older than I and another youngest sister.  My dad is the only person making money to feed 5 people in my household.

We were on a slow train which took approximately 2 hours.  Dad talked about his job.  He was an accountant with a transportation company with its headquarters at Taichung (台中) which was approximately 45 minutes from my home by bus. The account job requires skills in mathematics, and languages.  Dad could communicate well in Japanese.  He taught himself math and Mandarin. He was well respected in his company.  To avoid daily commutes, his boss allowed him to sleep at his office at night during the week. He came home on the weekends.

His salary could barely feed 5 people if only we were healthy and tuition was free.  At that time, there was no health insurance to share the burden.  There were no free educations for K to 12.  That means when we were sick, and when kids registered in schools, dad had to borrow money.  We were not able to get loans with low interest rates from a bank; dad often had to borrow money from friends with higher compound interest rates.  Vicious cycles then set in; the result was dad had to pay the debt with a big chunk of his salary.

When I was in middle school, I was often asked by my mom to write letters to my two elder brothers, Mo-KAi and Ting-KAi  begging for money.  The possibilities of receiving money from two brothers were very slim; however, once we received some, it was a big relief for a while.  

There were times that the person who loaned money came to my house  knocking on the doors at midnight  to ask us to return  the money.  We were very frightened. There was time that mom went out to the night market to sell some stuff so that we could pay off the debt.  One night, when I woke up in the middle of night and found out mom was not around.  The trauma set in, and I could not sleep that night; and I could not sleep at night for a long time.  I had life-long insomnia problems all through my life. 

The train stopped at Hsing-Jue.  We disembarked from the train to take a bus from the train station to the university campus.  On the bus, dad talked about his desire.  He wanted his 4 sons to be college educated.  He said that he even changed his name of Mai (買) to Hsu-Pei (四貝）.  It turns out the Mandarin 買 made of two radicals. The top is 四 , meaning number 4. The bottom is 貝, meaning jewels.  Literal translations of Hsu-Pei （四貝） is 4 jewels, or his four sons, Mo-KAi (模楷 1932-2022）,  Ting-KAi (廷楷 1935）, Wen-KAi (文楷1941） and Ming-KAi (明楷 1946）.   Yes. All our four, brothers were college educated, two of them even made into college professors ( Ting-KAi and Ming-KAi).  His final words of saying goodbye to this new campus was that education was the only way of being free from the struggle and fate of poverty.  Today, none of us are living in poverty.

Five years later, I received a generous graduate school scholarship from a very prestigious university in New Jersey, Princeton University.  The scholarship provided me room and board and all the tuition.  My brother, Ting-KAi bought me a ticket to fly from Taipei to New York in 1971.  This time, my mother and dad came with me to the airport to say goodbye to me.  On the day I received a paycheck from the university, I sent a check of $100 to my parents.  From that moment, I sent money home every month to my parents until 1999 when my dad died.  I did that because I knew how hard it is to live in poverty.  

You might ask what happened to my sisters ?  My oldest sister, 麗容 （1930-2022), was married early.  She only finished her grade school.  I have two younger sisters, Li-Tsu 麗姿 （1950），and  Li-Na 麗娜 (1954).  Li-Tsu was adopted, and was not well treated in her adopting family.  Her adopting parents were abusive, forcing her to marry an abusive husband.  That was a black spot on my dad’s legacy because sending Li-Tsu for adoption was purely for economic reasons.  Knowing his mistakes in Li-Tsu, he treated my youngest sister, Li-Na well.  He sent her to college and had a happy marriage.  Li-Na now lived in California with her husband. 

Today, I continue to have phone conversations with my most unfortunate sister, Li-Tsu, and send her money from time to time to apologize for my parents’ mistakes.

Walk with me, dad.  The walk sent me to a better education and later to become a college professor.  Thank you, dad.  .